let me call my wife, refinance our home, maybe sell the car and I’ll come back.
when my mum was the exact age i am now, i was like a couple of weeks old
i couldn’t look after a baby right now
i sometimes forget to eat because i’m sat around writing about mermaid biology
what the heck mum
@_@ when my mom was my age she had 3 kids already
That sounds terrifying.
I think one of my followers is really cute.
wish i was witty and cute but instead im sarcastic and annoying
I keep thinking oh man, I’m so immature. How am I allowed to be an adult.
Then I spend time with teenagers.
And it’s like, wow, okay, yeah. I am an adult. I am so adult. Look at me adulting all over the place.
when you masturbate twice on the same day
People will stop showing you pictures of their kids if you whisper “oh fuck yea” under your breath when you look at their photos.